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Author Topic: You can't fix stupid.  (Read 16733 times)

Barry in IN

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Re: You can't fix stupid.
« Reply #15 on: September 01, 2010, 08:06:05 PM »

So IS it more comfortable to walk now?
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Aussie Bloke!

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Re: You can't fix stupid.
« Reply #16 on: September 02, 2010, 08:12:34 AM »

G'day everyone,....

I bet he picked up the pace after that!

LOL



Aussie.
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soot shooter

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Re: You can't fix stupid.
« Reply #17 on: September 02, 2010, 04:51:49 PM »

And more than blood was found in his shorts!
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Kenny Solomon

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Re: You can't fix stupid.
« Reply #18 on: September 03, 2010, 11:18:50 PM »

The latest candidate for Mother Of The Year hails from the town of North East in (Erie County) Pennsylvania.

State police say a North East woman was drunk when she drove her three  sons to a Summit Township parking lot, where she shocked her brother and  then herself with a stun gun.

Darlene L. Newara, 45, told police she drank a cup of Jagermeister  liqueur before she put her sons into a 1992 Dodge Caravan and drove to  the Verizon Wireless store at 7190 Peach St. on Aug. 8.

S
he told an officer they were on their way to Waldameer Park & Water World.


-------------


Ms. Newara might have been under the alcofluence of incohol, but she wasn't as think as some people drunk she was.
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Kenny Solomon

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Re: You can't fix stupid.
« Reply #19 on: September 06, 2010, 10:05:30 AM »

Lakewood Colorado and the Denver Westworld website..............

Al Stults Jr. swears that when he told a Safeway deli clerk that he  likes large breasts, he was talking about chicken breasts -- not  anything attached to her. Which explains why he's so upset about  receiving a trespassing notice from the Lakewood Police Department  banning him from the supermarket for one year for his remarks.

According to Stults, 62, he visited a Safeway branch on West Colfax in  early August. He was in the company of a female companion, but she  wasn't with him when he headed to the deli counter to order some chicken  breasts. He describes the clerk who waited on him as a "heavy-set  woman," and when he pointed at the breasts and said, "I like the large  ones," he recalls her chuckling.


=============


OK, terrific !
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Kenny Solomon

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Re: You can't fix stupid.
« Reply #20 on: September 06, 2010, 05:00:58 PM »

No.

No..... He's not.

He's not doing what I think he's doing.

Can't be.

Not under a twin-2x4-propped-up truck next to the gas tank.

Must be my imagination.

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Kenny Solomon

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Re: You can't fix stupid.
« Reply #21 on: September 06, 2010, 05:08:47 PM »

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Col. Craig

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Re: You can't fix stupid.
« Reply #22 on: September 06, 2010, 06:15:11 PM »

Looks like a K & B home to me.
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soot shooter

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Re: You can't fix stupid.
« Reply #23 on: September 07, 2010, 04:54:13 PM »

What's the worry Mate? Graham is just doing routine maintinence.
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Kenny Solomon

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Re: You can't fix stupid.
« Reply #24 on: September 07, 2010, 10:53:03 PM »

Um...... Yeah............ Why are you postin.......

She's an attorney.

OK, so ?

She's an attorney in China.

What the..... ?

You know..... China..... Bastion of the world for freedom of choice.

C'mon, be nice......

It gets better....... This whole thing is over advertisements in a movie theater.

You gotta be shi.........

Read..............


Chinese woman sues cinema over excessive advertisements.

A Chinese woman is suing a cinema and the distributors of domestic box-office hit "Aftershock" for wasting her time by showing 20 minutes of commercials before the movie, state media said Tuesday.

Chen Xiaomei claims the Polybona International Cinema in the northern city of Xian and film distributors Huayi Brothers Media Corporation should have told her how long the pre-movie advertisements lasted, Xinhua news agency said.

Chen, who is a lawyer, has accused Polybona and Huayi Brothers of wasting her time and violating her freedom of choice.



==============


Hory clap, she no rike movie peopre.
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Col. Craig

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Re: You can't fix stupid.
« Reply #25 on: September 08, 2010, 02:26:55 AM »

No links, just my personal rant - sorry.

There are two things that have no place in public; undisciplined pets and children.  Between the two I rarely encounter undisciplined pets.  But unruly children in public seems as common as bugs at dusk.  WTF?  

Here is a typical scenario - just happened again, tonight.  We go out for a celebratory dinner tonight after completing an impossible month of work.  It is a special night out for us, not our typical weekly meal out.  We dress up a little, apply cover scent sparingly, etc. and head out to a ritzy dive we only visit when money is no option.  You know the place - the menu is printed fresh daily based upon the whim of the chef and the prices are just a single number leaving you to guess at the decimal place or comma location (If you MUST know what you will be charged for the honor of dining there).

We arrive, are seated, and begin to decrypt the menu.  "We" includes the boy.  He keeps his mouth shut unless he does not understand something.  He knows this is not the place to babble about BS.  If he does speak then he waits for an appropriate moment to make a polite inquiry after which he waits patiently for a redress of his concerns.  Of course, his behavior will vary with the dining environment so a place such as Hooter's or McDonald's he will be a little more ... relaxed ... than at a swanky joint in tonight's example.  

The table directly across from us has Mom & Dad, two grandparents, and a couple of boys.  From the moment we walk in the two boys are all we can hear!  After we are seated our own spawn asks to be excused to use the restroom and he is.  A few minutes later he quietly returns to his seat and looks over his menu.  Did I mention he is 9.75 years of age?  The two boys at the other table bracket his age by a couple years both ways.  These are the only three children in the restaurant but all the noise is coming from one table.  

NOW the parents begin to realize what little monsters their own children are and begin to feel uncomfortable - even embarrassed by their behavior.  After a lifetime of acting like this, suddenly their parents are directing these two demons to shut up.  They do not know what this means.  They have never heard this direction before so they ignore it.  They have never faced consequences so they do not understand it when mom or pop says 'Shush or I'll xyz'.  The only thing they understand is all of the sudden mom & pop are not fulfilling their needs of attention or whatever they had been providing a few minutes earlier.  So the boys deal with this be getting louder, demanding, etc. much to the chagrin of their parents.  

This is a vicious cycle that repeats until someone is screaming like a banshee while getting hauled outside by their belt and collar - usually drooling snot, spit, tears and blowing farts along the way, (sometimes it is me hauling out a parent like this but the looks and sounds are the same - j.k. ;)  )  Inevitably the rest of the family will follow in a hurry, short-tipping the wait staff as they rush out.  And the table is always left a wreck - spilled glasses, utensils and napkins on the floor, tipped over chair, and the carpet is soiled with ground in food droppings.

With the offending clan gone the beautiful sound of near silence settles upon the dining room.  Soft murmur of voices, clicking of utensils, and quiet footsteps of waitstaff are all there is to be heard.

That above happened tonight, but this is typical for us.  I have even seen people changing their babies diapers on the table - not just once but more times than I can recall at this moment!  WHO THE HELL CHANGES A DIAPER AT THE EATING TABLE IN PUBLIC?  The last time I seen this it was a couple of mothers who I learned from their conversation are both public school teachers.  Aha!  And there is one of the problems right there.

I can't dance and neither can Gloria - we both have two left feet.  Fine dining, however, is something we are both good at.  It use to be we'd view the expense of such luxury as the price to keep children out of the dining room.  Nowadays I have to wonder who let their standards down - the curators or the parents?
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Kenny Solomon

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Re: You can't fix stupid.
« Reply #26 on: September 08, 2010, 10:03:43 PM »

There's also a website called "EpicInjuries.com" (I found it because of a website I frequent called "FoodNetworkHumor.com).

September 26 on the TV show called The Amazing Race, you're gonna see the following occur:

Slingshot Fail.



 Heh.
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soot shooter

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Re: You can't fix stupid.
« Reply #27 on: September 09, 2010, 05:13:59 PM »

Assault by Moose Limb bait.
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Col. Craig

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Re: You can't fix stupid.
« Reply #28 on: September 09, 2010, 05:51:36 PM »

[snark]Thanks for the link - like I actually have spare time to waste there[/snark]
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Kenny Solomon

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Re: You can't fix stupid.
« Reply #29 on: September 15, 2010, 07:44:18 AM »


The Associated Press  JOPLIN, Mo. - A teenager dressed as a machete-wielding madman to  promote a Halloween store was the one who ended up getting a scare.

    The Joplin Globe reports a police officer pointed a gun at the  costumed teenager and ordered him to the ground Saturday after getting  a report that a disturbed person was brandishing a weapon on a city  street.

  The teen, whose name was not released, wore a mask and swung what  later proved to be a plastic machete while waving to cars outside the  Spirit of Halloween store.
 
 Other officers arrived and quickly determined the boy posed no threat.

 Rick Henderson, consignment owner of the store, says the boy was not  acting strangely. He says a large banner advertised that it was a  Halloween store.
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